On the road (sort of)
Tour dates
Every date below is fictitious — a parody of the classic “world tour” listing. Edit shows insrc/content/shows/.
Pillow Fort Pavilion
Bring your own flashlight. Capacity: 1 stuffed animal + band.
An intimate acoustic set under a carefully engineered blanket architecture. Security is a dog who mostly wants pets.
Under the Dining Table Arena
Sold out to crumbs. Standing room only (on knees).
Legendary venue for bands under four feet tall. Excellent natural reverb if someone drops a spoon.
Backyard Bowl
Weather permitting. Squirrels not refundable.
Sunset show with complimentary mosquito marketing. Opening act: the neighbor’s lawnmower (unconfirmed).
Whisper Library Amphitheatre
Cancelled for being slightly too loud in theory.
A conceptual performance of silence with occasional nodding. Librarian approved the press release, then reconsidered.
The Legendary Garage
Doors at after homework. Merch table is a cardboard box.
Where every great imaginary band begins. Free parking if you live there. Encore depends on battery life.